Friday Fictioneers 100-Word Story Challenge: The Pillars of Creation


Every Friday authors from around the world gather about the virtual fireside of fellow WordPress blogger Rochelle Wisoff to share flash fiction stories of 100 words, all inspired by a common photograph, and exchange constructive criticism. Readers’ comments are also welcome. This week’s photo has been provided by writer and intrepid bargee, Sandra Crook. Thanks, Sandra. Here’s the story that Sandra’s photo drew from me:

FF Photo Prompt 11 October 2013 by Sandra Crook

The Pillars of Creation
I
“I’m thinking of which poem, Frederick?”
“Alas, Charlotte, I am no telepath.”
“Australasian; Ossie Someone; by your Bliss friend.”
“Old Philip? English, darling.”
“Percy.”
“Shelley?”
“About kings’ feet. You smile, husband?”
Ozymandias.”
Mandias! That was the surname. Think you not these pillars inspired those kingly trunks? Your shoulders shake.”
“Tremble, at your exquisite, romantic vision!”
“Frederick?”
“I saw.”
“Couple, half-naked!”
“Vanished.”
II
“What’s that poem I’m thinking of, Fred?”
“Can’t mindmeld, Charlie darlin’.”
“Somebody Bliss. Ossie.”
“Philip? English.”
“Percy …”
“… Bysshe Shelley.”
“About huge feet. Your lips are twitching.”
Ozymandias.”
“Ossie Mandias. These pillars here – inspired those trunks? You laughing? Fred?”
“Yeh, I saw.”
“Costumed couple.”
“Vanished.”

Ann Isik
107 words

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About AnnIsikArts

Artist/Writer, Proofreader/Copy Editor
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17 Responses to Friday Fictioneers 100-Word Story Challenge: The Pillars of Creation

  1. glossarch says:

    Nicely done. I read this a few days ago but didn’t get it until today (which is entirely my fault). Very neat concept.

    Like

  2. MissTiffany says:

    Interesting! I had to read it twice to be sure I really got it. It’s the same couple, right? Having the same conversation, just in different times or realities or something. Am I right? I did enjoy it.

    Like

  3. Hi Ann,
    That’s one of my favorite poems. Used to be able to recite it. Sadly, these day, Ozzy Osbourne is more well known by most. Liked the interplay of dialog, and the playful tone. Also liked the centered lines, very pretty. I think it’s interesting that literature, poetry and prose, are a most lasting legacy than any physical monument. Maybe one day, long from now, our flash fictions will still be viable and still reaching the minds of readers in the distant future. In response to your comments on my story, those hillbilly characters are people I brush shoulders with out in the world all the time where I live in the American South, so it just makes sense to sometimes people my stories with them. Ron

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  4. Dear Ann,

    Too bad there is no ‘Love’ button to press. (Not that one. Cut it out.) I’d still be clicking on it.

    This was one of your best stories ever. Of course, I have a soft spot (in my head) in my heart for Ozymandias. http://ironwoodwind.wordpress.com/2012/06/25/476/

    This flowed off my tongue like honey as I read it to a friend. Thank you.

    Loved, loved, loved this.

    Aloha,

    Doug

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    • annisik51 says:

      I read your blog link. Exquisite writing and sentiments. It brought tears to my eyes. What you write I’ve echoed almost exactly in a poem I wrote: The Voice in the Wind. Here’s the ending:

      Around my feet, snow puddles.
      A leaf falls from my coat,

      cup-shaped, tempered by tempest.
      Improbable barque, sail-less,

      without wind, compass, crew,
      it launches across the pool,

      impelled by the reflection of a flame,
      flickering against its hull.

      Nobody gets this (my fault, no doubt!). The barque is meant to stand for humankind – Man – and how, with so little by way of impetus, (the mere reflection of a flame) yet strives. It’s a great mystery, that we want to keep on living with so little proof of reason. Not a good poem. Not like Ozymandias. Thanks for reading, Doug.

      Like

  5. Dear Ann,

    Can’t say which version I liked better. Loved them both. Nice one…or two, as it were. 😉

    Shalom,

    Rochelle

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  6. My favorite part is that she split the name into two parts. 🙂

    janet

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  7. Sandra says:

    I’m embarrassed to say I didn’t understand what was going on here, so I thought I’d come back later to see if subsequent comments enlightened me. But perhaps others are hanging back too! So I’ve read the poem now, and I’m further embarrassed to say that I now realise I read this at school, and had completely forgotten it. So thank you for re-introducing me to a very clever poem. And for your very clever interpretation of the prompt. I’ve interpreted your piece as being a ‘time-travel’ take, maybe a couple from another age briefly encountering the same (or another couple) from a later age. Please put me out of my misery… 😦

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    • annisik51 says:

      I never know where the photo prompt will take me. Every story is a journey. These FF stories are always packages wanting to be unwrapped. In unwrapping this parcel, I found that the ruins reminded me that while civilisations appear so solid, yet across time, prove to be just houses of cards. A house of cards is like a pillar. I’m fascinated by time and alternate and parallel realities. The phrase ‘Pillars of Creation’ came to me when writing this. I don’t know why. I googled it and came across the Pillars of Creation within the Eagle Nebula and that what we see today of them, probably died a long time before the images reach us. I’ve probably read something about them and forgotten! 🙂 Thanks for reading. Ann

      Like

  8. That was marvelous! I loved the language variances between the classical and the modern. Just really wonderful, this!

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