Every Friday authors gather around the virtual fireside of fellow WordPress blogger Rochelle Wisoff to share flash fiction stories of 100 words, prompted by a photograph, and exchange constructive criticism. Readers’ comments are also welcome.
(c) Janet Webb:
http://sustainabilitea.wordpress.com/
I Dreamt I Dwelt In Marble Halls
“I dreamt I dwelt in marble halls …”
Silk dresses; denim dungarees.
“I had riches too great to count, could boast
Of a high ancestral name;”
Her smile had faded when she first saw the barn.
“But I also dreamt, which pleased me most,”
They hadn’t come to her soirees. Not at first. He made her a garden; fenced it off with picketing kept pristine.
As he crossed from the barn, the faded song of his Bohemian Girl rose above the greying heads of her faithful audience.
“That you lov’d me, you lov’d me still the same.”
(c) Ann Isik 2013
99 words
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Graying heads of her faithful audience says a lot.
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Thank you Rochelle and if I ever publish this in the US I will remember to change ‘greying’ to ‘graying’! 🙂
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I have considered trying something like this, but wondered how it owuld turn out. I like the way you blended it in.
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Thanks Joe. Most kind. I like the added texture of other people’s words/voices in my writing – it seems – my rather cobwebbed novel begins with a similar ‘device’. ‘Marble halls’ v ‘picket fences’ just dropped in my head. I sing this song myself 🙂
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Wow, unique idea to mix it with lyrics 🙂
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Thanks Bjorn.
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Nice job. Enjoyed it.
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Thank you and for reading. Ann
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Nice sentiment in that last line.
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Thanks for reading Rog.
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Unique and haunting take on the photo. Poetry and prose mixed effectively. Ron
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Thank you Ron.
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Not familiar with the song, but it fits nicely in with the prompt and nobody gets strangled! You have to like that …
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Oh, I don’t know. If she keeps on singing, hubby might snap one day and … which might well be my fate, as I also sing this song!
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i really like how unique your take is to the prompt. great writing.
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Thanks very much! Ann
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very different. and a nice poem here..an interesting style
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Thank you kindly for reading. It wasn’t premeditated, but I liked the contrasting texture of another voice that the song lyrics provided. I think it was that pristine picket fence. It was odd. There had to be a story behind it!
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I like how well you mixed the dialogue with the story.
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Thank you!
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Nice take on the prompt. Nice touch adding the music.
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Thanks for reading. Sumi Jo is one of my favourite sopranos. I sing this too!
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Nice mixing of the lyrics into your story, Ann.
janet
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Thanks Janet. I’ll get back to you later. It’s 2 am here!
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No rush. I understand that!! Sleep well and we’ll talk tomorrow.
janet
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